“Sit on your hands!” – is what I told the management team in front of me. We were minutes away from starting an Open Space session with over 80 engineers from their department and I was offering the above as a caution before we started. They wanted to know how they should handle the kick-off of this Open Space process and I was only being slightly facetious with my sit on your hands comment. I had been working with this management team for the past few years, first on some team development then on setting direction for the entire department. We were now in the 2nd year of engaging the entire department in helping move their vision forward. I was trying to get across to these leaders that there is a moment in the Open Space process where they need to resist the urge to “help” and instead, sit on their hands and let the rank and file employees step up and proclaim what needs fixing.
In this instance, the managers were able to hold off long enough to let one employee step up and identify a topic he thought should go on the agenda, but right after that one of the managers could not help himself and jumped up to offer another topic. In hindsight, I should have been more stringent and say “don’t offer any topics until it looks like the employees have run out of ideas, then you can offer something,” but that’s for another conversation on effective large group engagement processes. Today I want to talk about how this tendency for managers to want to “help” is one of the 2 most common mistakes new leaders/managers make when they move from a “doer” role to a “leader” role.
Forgetting the Why
Let’s start with the other most common mistake. When I’m working with leaders individually or in a workshop/training setting, there is a moment when I share with them my “common sense” wisdom for how you show both leadership and empowerment in the same conversation. It is illustrated in the model below.
I will tell leaders that every time they engage their team or an individual in a conversation about what needs to be done, there is a 3 part rhythm to that conversation. The leader starts (1) by explaining what needs to be done and why, then (2) moves into discussions around issues relating to who needs to be involved, when we need to get it done and where things need to happen. (3) Lastly, the conversation moves into any constraints around how the team must get the work done.
The model posits that as we work through the process, the leader shows “leadership” by being clear on the What and Why, and shows empowerment by staying out of the Howas much as possible. Pretty simple – right? Unfortunately, what’s common sense is not common practice and that brings us to the first mistake new leaders make when engaging others – they forget to explain the Why. Sometimes it is self-evident, but I’ve heard from enough people that this forgetting the why happens quite a bit. Doing this may slow the leader down a bit, but it’s necessary, especially if you’re trying to build a culture of commitment vs. compliance.
Too Involved in the How
Now most of you can probably guess the other place where things go awry – the How. Like our leader in the Open Space story, a common trap new leaders fall into is getting too caught up in the How. Even if the intent is to help, what I caution leaders to remember is that people express their unique personalities through how they do their work. So, unless you have a good business reason for dictating means – resist the urge.
Finally, if you have an employee who doesn’t want to know the Why and wants you to tell them How…well, you’ve probably made a hiring mistake!
So, to sum up leaders – explain the What and Why and stay out of the How and you’ll do fine!
